Dillusions

Do you ever wonder why when you determine to start something why it doesn't seem as easy as you had it planned out in your head.  Examples:  I am going to start setting aside time to read the bible, I really need to do that.  I am going to start praying more.  I am going to get a handle on the projects that need doing around the house.  And my favorite...  I am going to start eating better and lose weight.  The last one is a humdinger isn't it.  When I was going through the book on the 17 Day Diet the first time several years ago my first thoughts were I can't do this.  I wasn't fond of yogurt or eating alot of veggies and fruit seemed like alot of work.  Then they had the audacity to have eggs for breakfast (which wasn't one of my things) and salads.  Yuck!!  So I didn't want to do it.  Didn't care that it would be helpful for me and make me feel better.  Then in the past couple of months many people at our church have gone on it and were having good results.  Now my life has changed enough that I enjoy salads, tolerate yogurt and have the time for breakfast.  So I am stepping out and doing it.   I wish I could say that I haven't been hungry.  That would be a lie.  I know it will pass as days go by.  What do I expect when I didn't eat regular meals, maybe two if that a day.  Whenever I eat three meals in a day I am always hungry a few hours after I eat which makes me want to eat more.  So this has been difficult.  Especially at work.  I work at Cousins and smelling the fresh bread and cookies is pure torture.  I have only been on this 1st 17 Days cycle for 4 days and it hasn't been easy.  I have discovered that eating three meals a day with 2 snacks isn't as easy as it sounds.  But I am determined to keep at it.  Especially when I got on the scale the other day and had lost 7 lbs in 3 days.  Cutting out almost all soda (nursed a 20 bottle for three days) is probably a big help.  So I am doing it, albeit reluctantly at times.  I am determined to succeed with alot of prayer support.

One good thing about doing this diet plan is getting up early to make breakfast for my husband and I to eat together before he heads off to work.  It has always been a desire of mine to get up early and have a quiet time with the Lord.  But my desire and my seemingly unwillingness to do cause it to never happen.  Well today I was up having my hot lemon water (not a FAN) I got out my bible and did some reading.  I am going through a Charles Swindoll book called the seasons of life.  I have been attempting to go through it for more years that I care to admit (ok I will admit it probably over 20).  It is designed to read three days a week (Monday, Wednesday, Friday).  I would forget one day or be so busy (sure I was) and I would skip a day.  Then I would just throw my hands up. 

It is interesting that today it was talking about disillusionment and being discouraged.  I have been feeling that alot lately.  I want to spend more time in the Bible and praying, I really do.  My actions wouldn't prove that though.  It isn't like I don't have the time.  I have plenty.  Before doing this breakfast thing I would be up about 8ish shower/bathe and sit and relax catching up on a tv show or something.  Did I!!  NOPE!!!!  I never start work before 10am and right now the latest I work is 2pm.  Dean doesn't get done working until 5pm.  So there is plenty of time to sit and spend time with the Lord... someone I claim to follow and love above all else. 

Today's reading was in Jeremiah where he was crying out about his circumstances.  He was whiplashed 40 times and put in those things where your arms head and legs are trapped and you are bent in half.  He was laughed and and called names, but he still followed the Lord and spoke the truth.  Yikes!!!  Really made me think.  I put so much time and effort into reading books and watching movies or tv.  It is time to funnel that time into something that will be more beneficial to my soul and heart.  Well off to finish my breakfast and get ready for work.